by Jess Carr
Early postpartum was really hard for me. We were in between homes, living with my parents (which ended up being a blessing in disguise), my spouse at the time went back to work immediately and worked long hours, my daughter was pretty colicky and didn’t sleep well, I had every issue you can imagine with nursing, and the list goes on. But looking back now, there are things I wish I could go back and tell myself:
1. This phase is temporary
It didn’t feel like it at the time, but the first couple months postpartum feel like a blink of the eye when I think back to it now. Take a few deep breaths and know that if you’re struggling, it does get easier.
2. Stop comparing yourself to other moms
I was constantly questioning why my friends’ babies slept better than mine, why they were so comfortable taking them in public and nursing so easily. Why was I so anxious? Why did I always feel like a hot mess?
What I know now from talking to tons of moms is that no one really feels like they have it all together. Yes, there are babies that are simply a bit easier than others, but we all have things that were hard early on. And I wasn’t doing anything wrong. Comparison truly was the thief of my joy in those first few weeks. Well, and sleep deprivation 😂
3. Take all the help you can get
I say living with my parents early on while our house was being finished was a blessing in disguise because I don’t know how I would have done it without help from my mom. I’m sure I would have survived, but with how much my daughter was up at night, my mom was a godsend. She’d help take feedings so I could get a little more rest, cook dinner for us, and simply just hold her once in a while so I could do simple things like get a shower (feels like a luxury in those early weeks).
When we moved out, she still helped, but I felt the weight of loneliness and anxiety in my first few days alone at home with the baby. I wasn’t great about asking for more help when I needed it, especially when I went back to work. And this is now the first advice I give to new moms – ask for help!
4. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough
I feel like in the days of social media, it seems as though everyone’s homes are perfectly put together, their kids are dressed in beautiful matching outfits, and I don’t know about you, but I was lucky when I simply had time to take a shower and vacuum in the same day.
As long as your baby is fed, clothed, and loved, that’s all they really need early on. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough for that tiny peanut 🙂
Take it from someone who was way too hard on herself postpartum – you’re doing great, it does get easier, and it doesn’t have to be perfect.
You got this, Mama! If you are newly postpartum and looking for a group of women following a similar program, join our community! Head to the Programs page to check out our postpartum exercise program. You’ll get access to our Facebook group where you can chat with The MINT Mamas and other Moms like you!
